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How Extreme Or Intense Are You?

This Self-Assessment Quiz was inspired by the work of Paul T. Mason. M.S. and Randi Kreger.

This self-assessment is for those of you who:

  • Alternate your thoughts from one extreme to the other – either it’s black or it’s white – there are no ‘grey’ areas in your thought process
  • Have difficulty regulating your emotions
  • Have difficulty behaving appropriately

Sometimes it is difficult to see ourselves clearly. This questionnaire considers both how you experience yourself and how others see and respond to you.

DOWNLOAD AND PRINT THIS QUIZ

Quiz: How Extreme or Intense Are You?

YES

Q

THOUGHTS

 

1.

Do you find yourself feeling very positive about someone close to you one moment, and then feeling that they let you down the next? Do you sometimes only remember the bad things about a person when you’re angry at them? When you are in a positive state of mind, do you see them as a hero?

 

2.

Do you see people in two camps, either for you or against you?

 

3.

Do you see yourself as being either in an ideal situation or a catastrophe? 

 

4.

Do you see yourself as being or having less than others?

 

5.

Do you have a hard time remembering or recalling someone’s love for you when you are not around them?

 

6.

Do you believe that compared to you, others are either completely right or totally wrong?

 

7.

Does the person you’re with influence how you think and express yourself?

 

8.

Do you remember situations very differently than other people do, or find yourself unable to recall them at all?

 

9.

Do you believe that other people have the power to make you angry, sad or happy?

 

10.

Do you believe it is your fault that people around you are happy/unhappy?

 

11.

Are you unwilling to admit to making a mistake – or do you feel everything you do is a mistake?

 

12.

When you see things in a particular way, is it hard to separate your feelings about it from the facts of the situation?

 

13.

Do you only realise later what the effects of your behaviour might have been on others?

 

/12

= TOTAL NUMBER OF 'YES’ ANSWERS


YES

Q

FEELINGS

 

1.

Do you often feel abandoned or excluded?

 

2.

Do you find yourself constantly feeling very up and down?

 

3.

Do you feel overwhelmed by very strong emotions, and don’t know how to handle them?

 

4.

Do you feel your emotions so intensely that it is difficult to put others’ needs – even those of your own children - ahead of your own?

 

5.

Do you feel distrustful and suspicious a great deal of the time?

 

6.

Do you feel anxious or irritable a great deal of the time?

 

7.

Do you feel empty when you are alone, like it is difficult to know who you are when others are not around?

 

8.

Do you feel ignored when you are not the focus of attention?

 

9.

Do people complain that you express anger inappropriately? Or do you feel that you have difficulty expressing anger at all?

 

10.

Do you feel that you never get enough love, affection or attention?

 

11.

Do you frequently feel spacey, unreal or out of it?

 

12.

Do you feel disconnected from others?

 

/12

= TOTAL NUMBER OF 'YES’ ANSWERS


YES

Q

BEHAVIOUR

 

1.

Do other people tell you that you invade their personal limits/boundaries/space?

 

2.

Do you feel invaded by others in terms of having your own personal limits/boundaries/space?

 

3.

Do you act impulsively in ways that are potentially self-damaging, such as spending too much, engaging in dangerous sex, fighting, gambling, abusing drugs or alcohol, reckless driving or shoplifting?

 

4.

Do you starve yourself, dislike your body, or frequently binge on food?

 

5.

Do you harm yourself, for example by purposely cutting, bruising or burning your skin, or by talking yourself down in negative ways?

 

6.

Do you threaten to kill yourself or do you actually make suicide attempts?

 

7.

Do you rush into relationships based on the hope of what you would like the other person or the relationship to be?

 

8.

Do people find you inconsistent; do they give you feedback that you constantly change your mind and/or expectations about things? Do people you love feel that they can never do anything right or satisfy you?

 

9.

Do people complain that they find you aggressive or frightening because you fly into unpredictable rages at the slightest trigger? Or do you have great trouble expressing your anger at all?

 

10.

Do you find yourself slapping, kicking and scratching others?

 

11.

Does it feel like you are constantly moving from crisis to another?

 

12.

Can people rely on you? Or do they complain that you are unpredictable?

 

13.

Do you want to be close to others but find yourself being distant? Do you feel most alive when you are engaged in a heated debate and/or fight? Do you end relationships and then find yourself trying to get back together again on a regular basis?

 

14.

Do you regularly cut people out of your life? Or do people regularly cut you out of their lives, without any reason that you know of?

 

15.

Do you regularly act competent and controlled in some situations but act extremely out of control in others?

 

16.

Do people experience you as frequently criticising and/or blaming others?

 

17.

Do you frequently act in a manner so as to ensure that your own needs are met first at the expense of others around you?

 

18.

Do you often find yourself saying or doing something to get the attention back on you when you feel you are being ignored or sidelined? Do people sometimes complain that you are being inappropriate?

 

19.

Do you often know what others are thinking and feeling without them telling you and then tell them what they should do about these thoughts and feelings?

 

/19

 = TOTAL NUMBER OF 'YES’ ANSWERS

Congratulations for even answering this quiz.

Should you want to be helped with any of the above issues you have answered ‘YES’ to, and you live in the Cape Town area, please visit Services or feel free to write to us.

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